Welcome to Earth Ranch, A camp for wayward youths.

Pay no attention to the island's active volcano,

 

SOS signal, or abandoned library. Ignore the deadly bees. Do not believe the ghost stories. And never, ever cross the Wall of Trust…

The plot thickens in the brilliant sequel to Bad Magic!

 

At Earth Ranch, things can get a little magical (some might say strange). Intrepid readers will discover a runaway boy, fishy cruise ship, strange cave paintings, dragon-like footprints, and other mysteries that Clay and his friends need to solve. Danger, adventure, mischief, mystery, llamas, and a delightfully irreverent and hilarious narrator make bestselling author Pseudonymous Bosch's anticipated new novel irresistible.

STOP! LEAVE NOW. THIS IS A SECRET STORY ABOUT A DANGEROUS SECRET I MUST NOT REVEAL.

 

Good. You’re curious. You’re brave. If you join this adventure, I will introduce you to some of the events and people in this perilous book. It is an alarming account of two extraordinary adventurers, a missing magician’s diary, a symphony of smells, and a deadly secret. Be careful – our enemies are watching. And tell no one...because the name of this book is secret.

 

 

BEWARE! DANGEROUS SECRETS LIE BETWEEN THE PAGES OF THIS BOOK.

 

Ok, I warned you. But if you think I’ll give anything away, you’re wrong. I’m not going to remind you of our heroes, Cass and Max-Ernst or their on going fight against the evil Dr. L and Ms. Mauvais, and I certainly wont be telling you about the nefarious Lord Pharoah, or how the kids finally meet the amazing Pietro!

 

 

THE SECRET TO THE BEST TASTING CHOCOLATE IN THE WORLD LIES WITHIN THIS BOOK.

 

I promise, your taste buds will tingle. Your palate will sing! Oh no, have I accidentally tempted you to read this book? Because in this tooth-rotting adventure, Cass’s mom has been kidnapped by the sinister chocolatier Señor Hugo! Can Cass and Max-Ernest discover the evil ingredient before its too late?

AVERT YOUR EYES! THIS BOOK CONTAINS TOP SECRET, SUPER CLASSIFIED, HIGHLY CONFIDENTIAL INFORMATION.

 

You’re not supposed to know that Cass may be in grave danger after eating the dreaded Time Travel Chocolate. Or that Max-Ernest, our expert hypochondriac, must diagnose Cass’s mysterious condition before it’s too late. For Max-Ernest, it’s a race against time; for Cass, a race through it. For you, well it’s a race to find out what happens.

I ALWAYS FEARED THIS DAY WOULD COME. A SECRET IS MEANT TO STAY SECRET, AFTER ALL.

 

A class trip to the local natural history museum turns dangerous when Cass accidentally breaks a finger off a priceless mummy. This “crime” of vandalism leads her and her friends Max-Ernest and Yo-Yoji on an expedition into a land of majestic pyramids, dusty tombs, and the walking dead. Is it Egypt? Or somewhere much stranger?

A Do-It-Yourself Mystery

 

I feared this might happen.

I knew reading was a dangerous

business, but now it's not safe for writers, either!

 

 

Pseudonymous Bosch is the anonymous pseudonymous author of the Secret Series. Not much is known about him other than that he has a passionate love of chocolate and cheese and an equally passionate hatred of mayonnaise. Rumors of Boschian sightings are just as frequent and about as reliable as reports of alien abductions. If you ever meet anyone claiming to be Pseudonymous himself he is almost certainly an impostor. The real Pseudonymous is said currently to be hiding in a cave in a remote jungle (although there are contrary reports that he is somewhere in Greenland).

 

PB's TRUE IDENTITY?

 

There have been many bizarre theories, tall stories, and baseless accusations over the years about the true identity of Pseudonymous Bosch. Most recently, PB has been identified as an obscure and apparently not very accomplished writer named Raphael Simon. We're not sure how this rumor got started, but from what we can ascertain Mr. Simon seems like a harmless enough fellow. He lives with his husband and twin daughters in California, and when contacted denied ever taking credit for Bosch's books. Although for the record, he was eating a bar of chocolate at the time and it's possible his words were misunderstood.

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Pseudonymous Bosch © 2016